Dino's testing

it had been twenty moons ago that she had lost her first kit, and to date he was still her only kit. She didn't understand it, why she'd put so much thought into her past, into a life she wouldn't be able to fix. After all, it was she who had let the loner worm his way into her heart. It had been her own mistake, and hers alone. But on days like these, all she could picture was her kit, as gorgeous as his father, stilled by death. Despite how she'd felt about the kits father, she had loved her kit and she'd wanted to raise him like a good mother. And in that heartbeat, she'd been forced to come to the understanding that she was not going to be a mother at that time. And it had been hard for her, oh so hard for her. That moment still was the most depressing thing that had ever happened to her in her longer life. And it was still the moment she'd felt the most shame. Surely it was starclan's way of punishing her for having a kit with someone who was not a clan cat. Still, despite this logic, it felt like a cruel punishment, killing off a kit who hadn't even begun to live his life, who would never know the joy of breathing in and out.

It was times like these, when she was depressed enough that she couldn't hold back tears, that embersky decided it would be best if she spent the night outside of camp. She hated waking up any of her clanmates just because she couldn't sleep. It didn't seem fair to them at all. So that morning she'd woken up with a coat made moist by the dew. The sun was not yet up, still just barely peaking above the horizon. Her dreams had been haunted by a a pair or gray-blue eyes and a small limp and lifeless figure. She had to take deep breathes to calm herself. Only once her breathing and heartbeat were steady did she even attempt to get up. Her limbs felt stiff, unused. The wet did little for her aging joints. Not that she was old, really. Magpiestar was proof of that. She just wasn't quite as young as she used to be. Embersky yawned, stretching her jaw out before arching her back, enjoying the burning feeling of her muscles tensing and stretching. She shook her coat, dislodging any pieces of moss that may have lodged themselves in her coat when she was sleeping.

Now that she was completely awake, she wasn't exactly sure what her intentions were. Surely hunting was her best option, it was always the best option when there wasn't anything else to do. The clan could always use fresh kill, no matter the season was. Embersky had always been better at fighting then she'd been with hunting, she was built like a tom in the sense that she was more blocky then delicate. Which didn't really seem fair to her. But she had always proved to be much better at fishing then hunting land dwelling prey. With this thought in mind, embersky trotted over to the river, enjoying the always comforting sound of it as it flowed and trickled down into the lake. With the sun having moved a little higher in the sky, she had to keep her shadow off the water so as to fool the fish into thinking she was not there. She peered at the waters surface, waiting for the brief flash over silver that would signal a fish passing by close to the surface. A few heartbeats passed before she found success, darting her paw into the water and pulling the fish out. As it flopped on the ground, she dug her fangs into the fish's throat. After a moment, it's struggling stilled. She bit into the fish before devouring it in seconds. With her stomach full, she could concentrate more effort into fishing. Suddenly, there was the sounds of paw steps in the reeds behind her. She let out a startled warning hiss before she recognized the figure of the cat. ashenmask, you scared me. she said it softly, not with half as much scorn as she could usually muster around her brother. The depression of her loss had it's hold on her and refused to let go, ashenmask or not.